Energy Drinks / Kymera Freakish Energy Mythic Melon

Kymera Freakish Energy Mythic Melon

Where can I buy Kymera Freakish Energy Mythic Melon? Online Store
How much does Kymera Freakish Energy Mythic Melon cost? $39.99

What's in Kymera Freakish Energy Mythic Melon?

Nutritional Information
Size: 102.0 FL OZ
Servings: 102.0
Kymera Freakish Energy Mythic Melon contains 2 (30ml/1fl. oz.) servings (in the 2oz. Bottle) or 102(30ml/1fl. oz.) servings in the Power Pak, which contains mg/% USRDA (whichever is available, or both, if listed) of the following: Calories 11, Carbohydrates 3g/1%, Niacin 15mg/75%, Vitamin B6 500mcg/25%, Folic Acid 50mcg/13%, Vitamin B12 63mcg/1050%. Each serving also contains a 590mg proprietary blend of undisclosed amounts of the following: Malic Acid, Natural Caffeine, N-Acetyl-L-Tyrosine, 1.3 Dimethylamylamine (which appears to be a prohibited performance-enhancing drug), Yohimbine HCI.

Jason's Review

In the mid-90's, fueled by ESPN's extreme games and Mountain Dew's ad campaigns, almost everything was "extreme". It appears, nearly 20 years later, the trend has come back around, from unlikely places, with potentially fatal consequences.

The new Pottery Barn Teen catalog, clearly features a young girl, dangerously close to a polar bear, controlled by some sort of freakishly festive shock collar. Irresponsible advertisements like these are why hundreds of thousands of polar bears are put down by park rangers every year, and why another several million have been slaughtered in barbaric "polar bear roundup" rituals, in backwards states that still allow them.

On that note, the freakishly powerful Kymera Freakish Energy comes in three sizes, the relatively safe 2 serving, traditional 2oz. shot bottle, the mini-heart-attack 6fl.oz. Mobile refill station, and the lawsuit-waiting-to-happen 102fl. oz. $39.99 Power Pak. This 102 serving container dispenses the same formula as their 2oz. Shot from a boxed container, not unlike the distribution method of your mom's favorite pre-fight holiday wine.

If we've learned one thing from Four Loko, it's that college kids love to irresponsibly consume alcohol and caffeine, disregard the servings per container, throw the entire concept of moderation to the wind, then somehow transfer the responsibility for their stupidity to the manufacturer.

Now, if you're not a 12 year old, or a college student so poorly parented that you behave like a 12 year old, Kymera's Power Pak is a great value. At $39.99, with free shipping, from their website, you're looking at 51 2oz. Shots for less than a buck each.

The flavor, which they call Mythic Melon, is accurately named, at least with regards to the melon. It has a mild melon flavor, which I don't find overly artificially sweetened, like 5-hour energy.

Concerning the energy, let me emphasize that this product contains 2 servings. I drank both servings, and was uncomfortably energetic. I've sampled over 500 energy products over the last 6 years, this is 1 of only about 5 products I actually wanted to wear off. Like my reaction to Tweak Extreme and VPX Meltdown, my hands and feet were ice cold, while my chest, underarms and back were sweating like a wrangler, cornered by wily polar bears. Interestingly, Kymera and VPX Meltdown share an active ingredient which could have added hours to Kris and Kim's marriage.

At the time of this review, the company president has set up a coupon code Scream30, on the Kymera website which will get you the 102oz. Power Pak, a shot glass and refillable bottles for only $29.99. That's 59 cents per 2oz. Shot, or my recommendation would be 30 cents per 1oz. Shot.

Guests's Review

I can describe my experience with Kymera Freakish Energy very simply, I feel like I'm on drugs. I will not elaborate on my inexperience, or otherwise, with "party drugs". I will only say that this is strong, and if people don't know what to expect from it, they might be taken very much by surprise. As an "experienced energy drinker", I felt it safe to consume 2 servings. To elaborate on my experience, I was sweating, and restless with deep and intense heart palpitations. During the most intense times, I felt something between hunger and nausea. I found myself clinching my jaw involuntarily. I thought a great deal more intently about the opposite sex in interrupted staccato fashion. Let me get back to the sweating. The sweating was so intense, I had to change a moisture wicking shirt mid-day because it was too saturated for my comfort.

I'm personally not looking for the aforementioned sensations, but I'm sure there exists a demographic who is. They should very much like the intensity of this product, should find the melon flavor easily palatable, and will likely be most enthusiastic about the price. I urge all consumers of Kymera Freakish Energy to exercise extreme care and caution relating to the volume consumed. We're reviewing this product at the standard $40 price for the 102 serving Power Pak. For some indeterminate amount of time, You can use the promo code Scream30 to get $10 off at

Kymera Freakish Energy Mythic Melon can or bottle design and textual information
The 2oz. Bottle of Kymera Freakish Energy Mythic Melon is mostly black with a green horned-lion with a snake tail, something akin to a Magic the Gathering masticore creature. The text, "Kymera" appears vertically oriented, in a font that looks a little like something on an NES cartridge. At the top, in tiny Street Fighter font, "energy shot", and in the same font, "freakish energy". On the back, "2 sservings" in Street Fighter font, then, in white, "Get Freaked! Kymera crushes fatigue so you can party, work, study and perform like a beast!" Also, there's a picture of melons with "Mythic Melon".

Then there's a ton of text, "Kymera", "Mythic Melon", a readdressing of this being 2 servings, then a short novel. "Usage: Drink one serving (1/2 bottle) every three hours. Experienced users may elect to consume all contents at once. Consume contents within 72 hours of opening. Limit three servings per day. Enhanced directions at Then, in big red letters, "Warning: Keep out of reach of children!". Then, "Beging with one serving to asses tolerance. Do not mix with other caffeinated products or stimulants. Do not take if under 18, pregnant or nursing, taking any medication, have high blood pressure, or any medical condition. Cease use and contact a physician immediately if you experience chest pain, severe headache, or any other health anomaly. Improper or overuse may result in serious adverse health effects. Never mix Kymera with alcohol and never drink Kymera while under the influence of alcohol."

Consumer Reviews

graordriver@2012-11-08 14:13:57
Looks like Kymera is out of business
jimmyG@2012-07-24 12:03:07
i think you should stop trying to inncorporate terrible jokes into your reviews. stick to how did it taste and how much energy it gives you. your writing skills are awful and you would think you would try and do as little writing as possible instead of calling more attention to it. this product is great and i am a very experienced energy drink user. i always start with the recommended dose because you never know how strong something is. Response by Jason: Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one cares what you think.
Vick@2012-07-24 12:01:08
I am sad to announce that Kymera went under and their products are no longer available.
Shmuel@2012-04-10 14:01:13
Adam, you're dense, of course the Pottery Barn thing was a joke - and a nicely played one, at that. Good review, and good product. The taste is acceptable, effects are significant, and value is impressive.
richyque@2012-01-21 15:21:18
This is the greatest energy drink i have ever drank, And the customer service is the best. 10 out of 10.
Adam@2012-01-21 15:20:11
Was that pottery barn advertisement a joke? I couldn't even tell because it was written so poorly so I took you seriously. Because that's a dog-- and lol-- attributing that to the slaughter of polar bears... For as good as you are at website development, you are equally bad at writing.
Jeff@2012-01-20 15:26:51
Kymera is an amazing drink. I had it shipped overseas and it was still and incredible value.
Katy@2011-12-23 11:18:31
This is the best energy shot I've had so far. I didn't have to choke it down, and within 15 minutes I was bouncing off the walls. And, at $1.99 for two on ebay, the price was awesome too.
Disclaimer: Writers for Screaming Energy are not doctors, and none of this website should be taken as medical advice. All nutritional/product label information about energy drinks and products on this site were copied as accurately as possible, but are subject to error. All information contained in this site should be considered our opinion.